DIE CHRISTIAN FAMILY Zum Autor: Larry Christenson Larry Christenson is a Lutheran pastor and a gifted author, who has written a whole series of other books in addition to the bestseller "The Christian Family" and has become known in the Federal Republic through his worldwide travel and preaching service. His wife, Nordis, is working with him on an extensive seminar for marriage and family. What Larry Christenson wrote The Christian Family became a bestseller. It deals, as the title says, mainly with the family. Chapter 1 God's order for married couples God's order is clearer and simpler than in this Bible verses Gen 2:24: That's why the man leaves his father and mother and hangs on to his wife, and they become one. This includes every aspect of the relationship between husband and wife. It says what it means to "hang on one another" God created man as man and woman. This is a fundamental feature of his creation order. It is one of the innermost traits of oneself. That's why God says: „I will make one like himself as a help to him.“→ Gen. 2:18 Husband and wife came together in a marriage. This made God's ideal of completeness apparent. The role of sexuality For the best results, follow the manufacturer's instructions. The sexual union in marriage is a wonderful mystery of God. Man was not created to be alone. Paul is very much in favor of celibacy in his letter to the Corinthians, but then makes a concession: however, if they cannot abstain, they may marry; for it is better to marry than to consume in desire. 1. Cor. 7:9 It's wrong to see sexuality as something lower evil and reprehensible. It is a gift from God for marriage. The physical union of two people who lead a marriage. An act of total self-surrender. The Bible also says it in chapter 7 of the first letter of Corinthians: „ The husband does the guilty duty to the wife, as does the wife to the husband. Do not deprive each other... So that Satan will not try you for your abstinence " This is the only chapter in the New Testament that specifically gives advice on sexual relations in marriage. Sexuality is just one aspect of marriage, it should not be above anything else. Sexuality is not a result of feelings alone, but a result of love in the 1. Cor. 7: 4 Let us read the counsel of the Bible: The woman has not the disposition over her own body, but the man, but so does the man have not the disposition over his own body, but the woman. Separation and divorce According to the social provisions, marriage is a contract between two persons, which can be dissolved if there are sufficient reasons. With such limited insight into marriage, it is natural for society to have all sorts of excuses for solving their bond or even for a probationary marriage. When the Pharisees came to Jesus to try to divorce him, he replied: Did not you read that God made man, man and woman from the beginning and said, "That's why a man will leave his father and mother and cling to his wife and the two will be one body so they are no longer two but they are one body." What God has put together man should not divorce." Matt.19:4-6 Separation and divorce are contrary to the will of God. He makes your marriage inseparable, it protects you against any danger that threatens you from the outside or from within. He guarantees the irresolution of the marriage. No temptation, no human weakness, can dissolve that he has put together. Anyone who knows this can truly say with confidence what God has put together, man cannot divorce! So Bonhoeffer. Divorce and separation is not God's plan for marriage. Jesus says the following words from a profound knowledge of the central position of marriage in God's eternal plan for human beings: „ Man should not divorce what God has put together.“ Matt. 19:6 Respect for eachother Mutual respect and understanding of each God-appointed position are the basic conditions of marital happiness. Spending a spouse means looking at him as more than just a person. For someone who has assigned a sacred position to God. We respect persons who hold a high office in public out of respect for their office. How much more should we pay attention to the person who is called to us in marriage, for it is a position of the highest dignity and of the greatest trust in the kingdom of God, if he is appointed by him husband and wife. Attention is an essential element of love. God has love in marriage destined to be built on a solid foundation, just feelings. This foundation is respect for the spouse because of the position in which he was asked by God. Truly an integral part of marriage is love. But marriage does not depend on love to continue to exist. Rather, the existence of love depends on marriage. Marriage gives love a position of stability and permanence in which it can mature. When we have a marriage, God commands us to love one another. From the perspective of God, love is not the prerequisite for marriage but the event of a wellestablished marriage. We educate love more as a willing servant of our marriage. This kind of love does not grow on the sandy soil of our immediate feelings. It is deeply rooted in the fertile ground of mutual respect. The woman has respect for her husband because God has given him the title of "husband". And so, too, does the man appreciate the woman whom God has honored with the title of his wife. Awe of the dignity and honor of God. The roles he has given to the spouse, thus establishes the love in the marriage on a permanent foundation. A foundation that makes love grow, just like Paul say 1. Cor. 13 : Love is patient, she is kind, love is not jealous, love does not boast, she does not puff up, she does not do anything unspeakable, she does not seek her, she does not let herself be embittered, she does not expect evil, she does not rejoice the unfairness she rejoices in the truth the love never gives up her faith her hope and her patience never fail. Love is eternal! The secret of marriage The Bible does not see marriage as a civic contract between two people who can be solved at will. How much more than a mystery to Paul writes in his Epistle to the Ephesians: The mystery is great, but I point it to Christ and the Church. → Eph. 5:31-32 In other words, every Christian marriage is destined to be a reflection of the relationship between Christ and his church. How many opportunities for giving are offered daily for the man - to express his love for his wife, who even gave his life for his bride. The world should be able to recognize this in every Christian marriage through mutual giving and mutual bestowal. CHAPTER 2 God's order for wives “ladies ﬁrst” is a well-known propriety rule. The Bible uses the same principle when speaking about God's order for the family. The woman is the link between the man and the children. If she lives according to the divine order, she brings the husband and the children close to this divine order. When the Bible first addresses the woman, "women are subject to their husbands as the Lord. For the man is the head of the woman, just as Christ is the head of the church. But just as the church is subordinate to Christ, so too are women to their husbands in all things. Ephesians 5, 22 24 Submission means: I submit to simple and conscious obedience to a Godappointed authority. God sets up this order to protect the woman, to preserve peace in the house, he wants to give the woman protection from the many harsh arguments of life marriage as it sees the Bible, it is not a democratic community. The wife is a wholly owned wife and the husband is a wholly owned husband. God gave the woman the opportunity to choose voluntary submission. Just as Jesus chose to be subject to Heavenly Father. Philippians 2: 5-7, "God has no one who invokes His right, but only He who willingly obey Him. Proverbs 31: 10-31, we read the full description of a good wife, she is good and happy to work - she is kind, wise, reliable, happy - she takes care of herself She knows her place and uses her intelligence, physical strength and godly character for good causes, enriching the lives of her husband, her children and the poor and needy in the community Wife, the husband gives his wife unqualified appreciation. "Her husband is full of her praise!" Where the man also properly fulfills his role in the order of God - hence "to love his wife and not be bitter against her" Col. 3: 19 - the submission of his wife becomes for him the source of love and devotion , something morally and spiritually unsurpassed beautiful. And Proverbs 31: 10 - 11a we read "Whom a capable woman is bestowed, - who finds her? - which has much more value than delicious pearls. Her heart is trusted by her husband "Submission means protection. The woman is exposed to many physical attacks in the world. That's why she needs her husband as protector. This is founded in the essence of the woman and applies to every age and culture. Therefore, no matter what comes to her, the woman should say, "I will talk to my husband about it". This is not an excuse, but the natural and correct answer and shows that the woman lives under the protection and authority of her husband. Paul says in 1 Corinthians 11:10, "Therefore the woman should be subject to the authority of her husband, and shall be one Wearing headgear as a sign of their submission because of the angels "Paul uses the word angel in a double sense. He uses it for the faithful servants of God and also for the rebellious flock of Satan. 2 Thessalonians 1: 7 am Thus, the woman also holds spiritual protection from the evil influence supernatural being. The devil knows that's why he uses every trick to undermine and eradicate the pattern of God and the divine order for the family. If a woman lives under the authority of her husband, she can move in spiritual matters with great freedom. Is shielded against dark robberies. She can lead a life of prayer with power and authority and practice spiritual gifts. God's purpose is for a husband to stand between his wife and the world. Will many physical, mental and spiritual burdens. For what happens at home, what happens in the community and in the church, first of all, the man responsible is not the woman. Subordination means social balance In the childlike relationship with God in the inner communion with Christ, in the possession of the Holy Spirit. In all these relationships with God and the world they are alike. In the oriental imagination, the woman is degraded to the slave of the man in the romantic imagination, she is raised to a mistress. And yet, the true Christian understanding of all these two is a long way off. God said to the woman: With pain you shall bear children - your will shall be subject to the man, and he shall be your master. And to the man, damn the field for your sake - thou shalt feed on it all your life, in the sweat of thy brow thou shalt eat thy bread, until thou return to the earth from which thou cameest. Gen. 3:16 19 This is an authentic law valid to this day, to which the fallen man must submit. - The man imposed the domination, but with the rule the heavy care and the hard work on the unprofitable soil of the earthly occupation. - The woman does not seek domination, she craves for her and it is the self-denial of her own will, she is the annoying test. God has determined a certain role in marriage for each partner. These special roles are part of the nature of marriage. The Bible says: "Women, be subject to your men, as it is in the Lord." → Colossians 3:18 Submission is not just an external thing, but an inner attitude. A woman can have strong, wellfounded opinions and yet submit to her husband. This is the case when she respects him inwardly and is ready and content when making the final decision. God is interested in the condition of the heart, not just in our appearance. So submission does not mean religious silence. It does not mean "putting everything in the hands of the man" Submission means I want to subject the person's rating to me completely to me. This is what Paul means when he makes his submission to God. "Surrender to God Himself .... And to arm your limbs to God of righteousness." → Romans 6:12 This is the model of submission for the relationship man - woman. If a woman in a matter withholds her understanding and impression she does not live in submission. Because she does not bring these things under the rating of her husband. She can leave the decision to her husband and to God. But she can and must express her thoughts freely. Because God wants to flow through them. God gives his gifts to the woman through this submission: intelligence, profound knowledge and judgment. It is the responsibility of both spouses that the roles of man and woman are not mixed. Husbands who have abandoned their role as directors of the house are as guilty as women who misappropriate the role. The Church, too, has not been spared the feminization of our culture. The men feel superfluous in the community. The highest task of the woman is to admit to herself - her time her strength for the husband, the children and the home. This does not mean that women cannot take responsible leadership positions and at the same time live according to God's plan. Submission is a path to spiritual power. A woman is more than a mother, housekeeper, cook, adviser and chauffeur. It cannot really be satisfied by activities and tasks. On the other hand, if she considers her husband and the children as her only happiness, that too is condemned to disappointment. It is God's purpose that we find our satisfaction in nothing but in Himself. A woman who gives Jesus first place will be a joy to "her husband" and to the Lord. See 1 Peter 3: 6 "Cast your roots in Christ, not in your husband, then you are free to become a true person and a good wife." Jesus wants us to bring our sorrows to the cross and transform your husband into To let God's hands. A woman who trusts in God does not nag about her husband. Submission guarantees results from God. Therefore you women should be subject to your men, so that those who do not believe in the word, through the woman's conversion, will be won without a word, when they see how you walk in purity and godliness. " →1 Peter 3: 1-2 It can give their husbands a living testimony. An attitude of submission is the power of the woman. Even good persuasion does not help the man. For good persuasion is transformed into sue and punitive sermons. Indignation, coldness and alienation are the consequences and the cause of a lasting misfortune is laid. 1 Peter 3: 2 still in due time, in his holiness, he will know it, and he will thank God for the patience with which the sufferer has endured. "The man now had the true spiritual authority, and he called that Blessings of heaven and the protection of the angels on his wife. This is the divine order as it blesses the family, church and people. You women, rejoice over the authority of your husband. Submit to him in all things, for that is your special privilege to live under the protection of his authority and in this pattern of the divine order, God will meet you and bless you. God will make you a blessing for your husband, for your children, for the Church and for your people. CHAPTER 3 God's order for children God's mission to children can be expressed in one commandment: "Children, obey your parents in all things, because that pleases the Lord" → Col. 3:20 The personal relationship of a child to Jesus develops in direct relation to the obedience it shows to his parents. Jesus lives and works in the life of an obedient child. Therefore, an obedient child is a happy child. A child may sometimes check the authority of its parents to see how far it can go. It may feel very unhappy in a given situation when his own will does not agree with his parents. But deeply in the heart, it would like to know that the authority of his parents is firm and that they can rely on it. A child can rebel against parental authority, even rebelling against it, but it will rebel even more against a lack of parental authority. For although the natural man is still in the child ..... Romans 7:15 ... so his relationship with Christ is equally alive. If it is constantly disobedient to its parents, it now experiences a deep discomfort in its mind-life, for its relationship with Jesus has been tarnished. His dissatisfaction is related to his disobedience, it is too young and too weak to force oneself to obedience. His parents have to guide it. Each child will feel a deep inner contentment, if helped, the path of obedience going. Because that is the focus and expression of his attitude to Jesus. Obedience - not at whim The modern methods of raising children make a lot of children intuitively have sense of right and wrong, decency and indecency. The Bible does not say, "Children, obey your parents, if they are right." She says, "obey your parents in the Lord, because that's right." Even if they are not right. → Eph. 6: 1 The obedient child lives by the divine order and therefore shares a deep sense of harmony and perfection. Of course, the parental part must try to act in every way fair, just and also in tender love for his children. But parents are also human and make wrong decisions. The child is not responsible for weighing and evaluating the decisions. The decision and responsibility remains with the parents. The child's responsibility lies in obedience. The time in life comes too fast, where the child grows up and it will be responsible for its judgments and decisions. But God has arranged the family so that a child is freed from the responsibility to judge and decide. It just has to obey the orders of its parents. Only in this way can it be protected to go through innumerable aberrations of stupidity, ignorance and stubbornness and bring it about in its development. According to the logic of his own little world, his unattended actions will always get the child in trouble. And here lies the reason why God protects it and puts it first under parental authority. There are no exceptions to the commandment of obedience to children. Without limitation, it must be put down and sharpened. The parents will inevitably make some wrong decisions and give unclear requirements. However, you should never hesitate to admit a real mistake and beg your children's forgiveness. You do not need to fear losing your parental authority. Any authority cannot be derived either from ourselves or from our perfect perfection as parents, or from the childlike recognition of that authority. It explains itself as all true authority from the one who always stands behind us and supports our claim to authority. The authority of the parents depends on God, who has used them as such persons of respect, towards children. God expects parental open remorse from the child as well as from the parent. To watch the fear and to lose authority in the child, if one admits an offense, is the lie of the devil. On the contrary, their authority is actually strengthened and strengthened if you have the courage to be as honest with yourself as you ask the child. For then they embody the kind and authority behind which God stands. The authority of the parents is not their own authority, but it is given by God. The idea that God has empowered parents protects them from a sense of inferiority and empowering them with authority. All authority is from God, but it is bestowed for the benefit of the subordinates. Since Christ came, not to be served, but to serve, the character of the Lordship in all who respond to his meaning is different from before. But whoever is gifted with authority by God must hold on to it, he must believe in it and must assert it. Not out of selfishness, but out of loyalty, not because he likes it, but because it is given to him by God in order to work with it. We have to rely on the fact that we are in the right, if we ask for the right that we recognize. Obedience, and indeed the willing obedient, to remember the inner reason, founded on reverence, is not a virtue, it is the virtue of the child, the epitome of all good that is to be demanded and expected of the child. For this it is educated, so that firmly in its time not out of external compulsion, but out of inner impulse, out of conscientiousness follows the will of God and the guidance of the Holy Spirit. So finally: Children: obey your parents! That is what God wanted for you. If you obey them, you obey him. Thus the omnipresence and grace of our Lord Jesus Christ will stand over your life. CHAPTER 4 God's order for parents God's Order for Parents In a word that the apostle Paul addressed to the church in Ephesus, the order to the parents becomes clear: "Do not irritate your children to anger, but draw them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."Eph. 6:4 The apostle almost so God's order for parents in three basic directions together: Love, discipline and instruction, "Get used to a child on the way, because it should work, then as an adult will not deviate from it." Proverbs 22:6 Glen Clark, one of the great teachers of the previous generation's life, says that every child is born with a "sealed mission" or a sealed vocation. Every person has a unique purpose to fulfill. The same prevails, even if someone is born again in the community. The apostle Paul describes the church as the "body of Christ" in which each member has a unique position and function, as well as in a body the eye, the ear, the foot have a unique position and function. Everyone is born into the world and is incorporated into the womb with "sealed tasks". Part of the mission of the parents is to help the child, which is what God's plan should be and should be. This means that parents must place themselves under the creative guidance of the Holy Spirit in the treatment of their children. All parents face the difficult task of accepting their children in all their diversity. Parents need to be careful that they do not seek to realize their own desires and aspirations in their child. You have to ask yourself the following questions: Do I handle correctly? Is my action right for this child? Is my teaching a help to prepare this child for his life? Instructions: The instruction of our children begins with thorough instruction. For example, The instruction in table manners, tying in shoes, moral values, driving in the car .... With patience and love we should teach the children what we expect from you. It is the parents' responsibility to make sure that a child knows exactly what is expected of him. Not only does a child need to understand that, it must be helped in practice to do a job properly and well. The term work includes all tasks that a child has to fulfill inside and outside the home. The parents have to teach their children and practice them, so they will gladly take over work. You can educate children in Christianity, and by the grace of God they will become reborn children of God. But that has no value for God or for you, or for anyone if education fails to work. A lazy Christian will never do anything for God. What man sows, that he will reap. Gal. 6: 7 It's wrong to wait until it's too late. To ask and help God to hear at an early age where something else can be done. Parents have a lot of other things to do in the early years of their children. But it is to pay that price when you see that the children whom God has given you to educate for God, for his glorification. It should be educated to grow up and lead a happy, meaningful life. Children learn obedience by working. Therefore, start training your children as early as possible. A concert pianist, becomes a concert pianist through long practice sessions. Children learn to work through repetition, so we learn everything, whether it is for the good or evil. Of course, kids need time to rest and play. Everything in the right proportions gives the children the right grip and the security they need. The teaching in the field of virtues and moral values: Truthfulness, Faith, Chastity are the three cardinal virtues of youth. And they are the foundations of all true Christianity. It is good when our whole being has internalized a profound abhorrence of lies, unbelief, and unchastity for the children. Establish Rules Each instruction includes setting up certain rules. You have to pay attention to two principles that are equally dangerous: On the one hand, an oversupply of small rules, on the other hand, your established rules. Children who have never met a fixed order that they had to follow are cheated children. Betrayed because they had lazy and immoral parents. Establishing and adhering to rules requires effort, will and determination. The time and effort they put into their children, a few years later, they will get back with interest, if your child thanked God for his parents, because they had the courage to set up some reasonable rules and then to follow them. Some examples: About the cleanliness: Children have to clean up their things. About eating between meals: Children do not get food other than fruit between meals. About meals: Children have to eat. About going to bed: A set time must be respected to go to sleep. About playing in the living room: children are not allowed to play with uhu or paint in the living room. Evening guests: Children are not allowed to get out of bed when guests arrive. About TV: Children should not see exciting TV programs. I would like to expand this one point the Internet: Children should only be able to visit age-appropriate websites and get a limited time for the Internet. Dr. Max Rafferty says: We have been soft where we should have been adamant, gave our permission where we should have been sharp. Have been generous where we should have been stingy. Uninterrupted, where we were over the ears, should have been engaged in the education of children. Dr. Rafferty's questions and comments are an uncomfortable exploration of the areas in which parents neglect their duty: do you give your teenagers more money for lunch, school supplies, and Saturday night dancing than they need? Do you know where your children are and what they do every minute after school is over and they are not home yet? Do you know the friends of your child? Do you know parents of your child's friends? Therefore, if rules are to be useful, they must be simplified and their numbers reduced. One way of simplification is the principle of time limitation. Visiting at Cinema, TV, Internet, Comics ... Reasonable rules and restrictions set by adult society are necessary protection for the young people. If society does not perform these tasks, then at least the Christian parents must do it for their children. Even if it imposes standards on children that are significantly different from those of the surrounding society. Be a role model. First, do what you want others to do. Be it with your whole being. If your demands are in conflict with what you are in secret, do not expect success or blessing, but be sure your education skills will be shunned. Paul could say, "Imitate me, as I imitate Christ." 1st Cor. 11: 1 Parents must behave in a way that encourages their children to copy. Therefore, parents must be obedient to God so that their children can follow them. If you want obedient children, you have to be obedient to God yourself. We need to reflect ourselves in the mistakes of our children and the sad experiences we have in them are destined for humiliation. The most hidden, which knows only God apart from us, he sometimes shows us to our own eyes and gives us a reprimand, which cuts all the more deeply into our conscience, since nobody understands them except ourselves. Nothing will substantiate parental authority more than the example presented. Here we come across the true nature of authority. An authority must unite in itself everything that represents community. It must practically embody the principles by which it leads the community. The authority of the parents is established by God. He ordered the family, he is the father of the family. God requires no more from the parents than they ask for in his name from the children. Breed - this is something parents have to see clearly, God has given them the responsibility for the education of the children. If they raise their children according to the word of God, he will be with you and bless them. According to God's word, the father is responsible for the breeding of the children. "Do you hear sons of a father's admonition .... Since I was still a son to the father, as a tender only child in the hat of the mother, he instructed me ..." Proverbs 4:1-3 It is the office of the Father to admonish and educate the child. He will take care that his orders and that of his wife are carried out. Something in which both parents and children should practice is obedience. The obedience of the child is not only desirable or even optional, but must be demanded. God demands it from the parents and the parents demand it from the children. By conquering we have victory over the old man, this is done through self-punishment. What Christ has overcome through bitter suffering and killed, that we should not wake again and bring out of the grave. But as we are new creatures, but we do not have adequate tools, vigilance and discipline are necessary. The chastisement has paternal intention to save, to clean as well as the intention of one legal assertion of the law. Breeding supports the instruction. Education should start in infancy. A child notices whether it can skip with its parents as it wishes or not. Men are not afraid to be boss. Children must realize that one in the family is stronger and more experienced. If the situation requires it, you just have to say "No, you cannot go" or "No, you cannot have it". The child may protest against it. Basically, it will be satisfied. He feels the great love. It feels good judgment, which protects it from its own folly and lack of experience. There are no heavy penalties needed. A very small punishment, punctually performed, does its effect, to which one does not bring with all threats. However, if a severe punishment is necessary, it must be done with protection of honor, not in the presence of siblings or strangers. "Because the verdict on the evil deed is not immediately carried out, the courage of human beings grows to do evil" Ecclesiastes 8, 11 Corporal punishment as the way of love "Who saves the rod, hates his son; whoever loves him chastises him in time." Proverbs 13:24 It is sentimentality, not love, to hold back with corporal punishment. The Bible even uses a harder expression: hate! Teachings that are not endorsed by biblical discipline cannot convey a child's love and understanding. They show at most a lack of interest. The tail is the first response, not the last resort. Chastisement shows love and fear, is a reflection of our relationship with Heavenly Father. Israel's great creed, which sustained it as one people to this day, unites the same commandments to love God and to fear Him: "Hear Israel, the Lord our God is a Lord. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your strength .... You shall fear the Lord your God, and you shall serve him and swear on his name.” Deuteronomy 6:5 and 13 To educate a child in obedience to God is to educate a child in love. Breeding does not fight against love. It is a channel through which love flows. In all of this, love should not be forgotten. Love is often small things like: a short time spent together, a casual tenderness, a trip to the country, an afternoon at the beach, a song at the table, a compliment to the new friend, or a prayer for a better day in the country School. Maybe you just have to put the newspaper aside and listen to the child. Maybe you just want to brush his hair out of his face, wipe away a tear, or say blessings in the evening. There is a basic principle of family education, namely the cooperation between father and mother. Mothers have to agree with the children. This establishes the spirit of authority in the household. If one finds a house full of bad children, one can almost always expect that the mother has the habit of contradicting the father, disregarding his orders or thwarting him behind his back. Being a father or mother involves a sublime responsibility, and that is why God has issued clear instructions to help us fulfill His will. It would be unwise to leave this safety-giving "Noah's Ark", which God intended for us, and instead walk the path of a sick and dying world. Through chastisement, the child will change his outward behavior, but his nature can only be changed by the Holy Spirit. If parents have understood the essential purpose of educational measures and their limitations, you will be spared many problems. A father can cause a child to sit up while eating, but he cannot instill that the food tastes good. He may demand to sit quietly beside him in the church, but not expect the child to like it ". He can demand respectful behavior, but he must ask God for the inner loving attitude and respect of his child. I put my deep hope, pray, yes, trusting faith in the fact that my children once become believing Christians. No matter how severe or mild, I can impose this belief on you. In the family prayer, in conversation, in education, this attitude of faith is offered to you. Each individual must decide for himself if he wants to become a child of God and follow the teachings of our Lord Jesus Christ. Being a parent means a huge responsibility. God has given clear instructions to help us with this. Your parents! Teach your children, raise them and love them. So the blessing will come down on your children. So they will grow up for the blessing of others and the glory of God. CHAPTER 5 The order for the husband "Husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church and sacrificed his life for you ....." You men love your wives and do not be hard on you" → Eph. 5: 25a, Col. 3:20 This kind of love does not depend on the feelings of the individual, not even on his direct actions. The standard is the sacrifice of one's self. Men love your women that means: sacrifice yourself for you! What does love mean? The original language of the New Testament was Greek. For the English word love there are three different expressions in Greek: Eros means love in the sense of passion, feeling and desire. Our word erotic I derived from it. This word does not appear in the New Testament in this sense. Phileo means love in the sense of human affection and human interest. Our word human love = philanthropy is derived from it. This word is rarely used in the New Testament. Agape means love, measured by the victim. This word is very commonly used in the New Testament. She is the love of John 3:16 and 1 Cor. 13 The word agape also used apostles when he said, "You men love your wives" He expressly means a love that is ready to be sacrificed. For he continues: "as Christ loved the Church and gave his life for her" Eph. 5:26b Here we have come to the very root of God's order for the family. The father was appointed as an authority over his wife and children. it looks like this is a supremacy of the man. Which means: "I am therefore in the house of rulers on whom everything depends ...." But the model is Christ, even for the authority given to a man and a father. The authority of Christ rested in his self-sacrifice. When he sacrificed himself on Golgotha, he came to his disciples and said, "To me is given all authority in heaven and on earth." Matt. 28:18. It is therefore the authority of Christ, and consequently, even with the authority of the husbands, it is not a human, carnal power. It's not that one person rules the other. Church is a divine and spiritual authority founded in self-sacrifice. The man has to take care of the wife and family. The church must seek all the best and well-being from Christ alone. Similarly, women and children must be able to expect material needs from the faithful care of their father. A husband and father who has taken his responsibility to God seriously, must therefore make Jesus a reality in his life: "if anyone wants to follow me, deny himself, take up his cross and follow me" It is more than the noblest and most natural love that a man can feel for his wife: she is like a rare flower in the Garden of God, thriving only when her own being is denied, sacrificed, and given to death "Love your wives" a call to communion with the Passion of Christ, to the communion of the cross, your husband’s love your wives, that means: take care of their spiritual well-being A man who loves his wife according to this Bible word looks after her especially His first concern must be that his wife is in the right relationship with God, knowing that every deep happiness, as well as inner fulfillment as a wife and mother he can only survive on the foundation of his relationship with Jesus Christ. Since first there comes the absolute ruling claim Jesus Christ. God requires that the man should deepen the internal respect his woman to Christ. The highest duty of the Christian man the worry for the sanctification of the woman. His model is Christ, he has sacrificed himself for his church to bless them. He should change his woman not only in Christian one lead the way, he should also muster everything to make to her the full blessing of God in the church accessible and to hold them at home by prayer and word always straight, to strengthen her sense for the higher and heavenly ones and to carry her Christian knowledge. A priest does not have the competence to come along against the will of the man to the minister to the woman. And also the lawful minister has to do to himself huts care for the soul welfare of the woman to take over who is entitled to the man. He leaves quiescent part of the responsibility for the soul welfare of all members of the family in him. However, the man feels the gravity of the load of this responsibilit. Director of a municipality account for her state and everything what in her goes forward admit has, according to the house father for his house. The person and God keep to him, and praise or reprimand meets to the virtues him first or bad habits of his wife. It is able and nobody should exercise it such a determining influence on the soul welfare of the woman, when he. If he likes it doubt or not, his behavior is from extensive results for you, to the good or to the bad person. The man should provide for the sanctification of his wife. Will provide for it when he thinks in the fact that she is holy. She is it, because she is a Christian. It is entrusted with him as a sanctum, and it is incumbent upon him to do for it everything, this is preserved not only in the magnificence that they are also fastened in it and is completed. Nobody can be of a woman thus a bigger obstacle in the good, than her husband. However, nobody is able to her also so much for the support in all good redounds as him. He is used by God to be a mediator. She can learn confidently what he has received supporting for the welfare of the soul in the church. 1. Cor. 14:35. If she is ´reluctantly against the way of the welfare, has not despaired although of better examination of the man, he is not disgruntled, not distrustfully against them, but with commensurate determination and mildly he sticks to the good, trust him that God illuminate by him his woman, will retune and lead. He does not suffer which originates from the ecclesiastical divisions which the enemy has incited among the Christians an estrangement of his heart against his woman. A man has to do his responsibility for the family, as well as God them sees taking seriously. God has appointed him to be the ecclesiastical head his woman. Christ provides for the growth of his church and preserves them. In the same measure the husband is responsibly for the growth of his wife and for his family. This parallel is given unmistakably in Eph. 5:25-33. Their husbands love your women this means: Leads the way of you on the way of the cross! He presents himself for you. That is he leads the way the way of the cross of her. What tells to sacrifice itself and to die the old I. And he does this not only to own sanctification, also around their sake. He drags them onto Christ as he himself allows to the cross to do his work in his own life. An example: Because of something there is a dispute in the marriage. The man should now lead by example. If he goes "the way of the cross", he will first humiliate himself. He will apologize for what was wrong with his behavior. I have to die, because it may well be that the main fault lies with his wife. But that does not matter. Let us remember Christ. He humbled himself under the guilt of the sinners "when we were still sinners" Romans 5: 8 The man should not judge the sin of his wife and expect that his repentance might have any effect on her. He should go the way of the cross without purpose. To give himself up and his own rights, because he is called to do so by God. Access to all spiritual life and blessings is the busses. The man precedes the cross way, in front of his family. For he is called to do so by God. The Holy Spirit first gave him knowledge, for his own sins. He knows that repentance and forgiveness belong together. The life and love of a man should be a daily "burnt offering" a daily sacrifice of his own being. The Holy Spirit, in his infinite wisdom, can use that for new. This sacrifice means that suffering is inevitable for man and father. But suffering is precisely the calling and the will of God. "Unless the wheat grain does not fall into the earth and it dies, it remains alone, but where it dies, it brings much fruit. "John 12:24 Of course, this word means much more than to feel tender and heartfelt feelings for his wife. It means dying how Christ died for the church. From such a understood death, the Holy Spirit wants to grow fruit for the whole family: Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and discipline. Gal. 5:22 You men love your wife that means: Exercise your authority in humility, the rule remains in the humble attitude that is given to it. But he does not feel it as a privilege, but as a duty. He never thinks of the power he has been given without the accountability he has been given. What happens in the house happens according to his will, because the responsibility rests on him. If he tolerates the foolish, harmful, offensive of his own, there is no excuse for him. Because the authority and responsibility for his family was not given by men but by God. The husband must also fully respect the duty of the wife and her responsibility to the area of the house, although he has responsibility for everything that happens within the family. He generally has to worry about everything necessary, but gives the immediate responsibility and authority to carry things into the hands of the woman. His authority is not reduced when he leaves certain questions to their decision. When it comes to practical questions, especially common sense is required. This is the area of their particular responsibility, just as the board of a company leaves certain things to its department heads. The woman looked with respect to the peculiar sphere of activity of the man. In Proverbs 31:10, a good woman is described as "far more precious than a gem." You men praise you "many women have done well, but you surpass them all" So you men consider your women to be a treasure entrusted to you by the benevolent God. Love her, honor her! Recognize her gifts. Appreciate her efforts. Gently deal with her feelings. Every day you should re-express your love with tenderness and seriousness in some way. "You men love your women and do not be bitter against them. Col. 3:19 The forms of propriety are a not to be despised support of those reciprocal. Respect, from which a Christian marriage must be founded. Carelessness of domestic behavior in clothing and language is close to recklessness. Like cleanliness - purity of the soul, contempt for aesthetic considerations easily leads to a contempt for one's own person. If the man has acted against his wife, he has caused concern to his wife. Then God closes his heart because he has closed his heart to his wife. As he was against his subordinates, God will be against him. He cannot reconcile himself to God until, through gentle and self-sacrifice, he has reconciled himself to the wounded wife. Spiritual authority has its roots in a paradox. Jesus says, "If anyone wants to be the first among you, then he must be the last and the servant of all." Jesus himself shows this by washing his feet with his disciples. "After Jesus knew that the Father had given all things in his hand ... he girded himself with the towel ... John 13: 3-4 Fully conscious of his spiritual authority, Jesus washed His disciples' feet. This is the archetype of every spiritual authority. Not proud, not power nor self-assurance are sources of spiritual authority, but humility. The authority of the man over the wife and the children is a spiritual authority given by God. Its principle, therefore, is rooted in the same paradox, which illustrates Jesus through the washing of the feet and further through his death on the cross. Who wants to exercise spiritual authority, must be the servant of all ... must even go to the death for which he is responsible. You men love your women: Give up your pride, your egocentricity, your rights! Follow your Lord Jesus on the way to the cross! And the transforming love of Golgotha will grow in your homes. SUMMARY FIRST PART: This chapter makes it clear that God has planned his fellowship with us on earth as a family. There is an incredible abundance of blessings associated with it, but only very few people of our time understand this and therefore do not even begin to enjoy it. The Divine Order is a family structure. The man as head, as authority over the family, which is also under the authority of Jesus. The woman under the authority of the man and the children under the authority of the parents. In the first part of the book the order for families is divided into the order for Couples, husband, wife, parenting and children closer. The man lives under the authority of Christ. He is responsible to him for the guidance and care of the family. The woman lives under the authority of her husband and is responsible to him for the way she manages the household and cares for the children. The mother exercises authority over the children, representing her husband / father. The children live under the authority of both parents, but the authority lies essentially with the man. God has made the well-being and happiness of the family dependent on observance of the order he has instituted. Married Couples The fertility of marital love is not limited to fathering children; she must also extend to her moral education and her spiritual education. Parenting "is so crucial that it is hard to replace where it is lacking" → (Gen. 3). Nowhere else in the Bible are the tasks of husbands and wives as concrete as in chapter 5 of Ephesians. Based on the Creation Command, it shows what a Christian marriage looks like. The man and woman created in the image and likeness of God become "one flesh" in marriage (Gen 2:24), that is, a community of love that bears witness to new life. Based on mutual respect, contiguous, one before God. God has planned it, which we already have in Gen. can read. Husband The husband is the head of the family. He is responsible and accountable. He has received the authority of God for his wife and children, but he is under the authority of God and his head is Jesus. The authority of the man for the family is in proportion to how Jesus has authority over the church. He sacrificed himself and gave everything for her. A serving way to carry that authority. As Jesus tells me, power is given over everything and washes the feet of his disciples. This kind of authority is required of the head of the family, a sacrifice, a servant. He should love his wife and not be hard on her. Wife It is God's word to the wives: "You women, submit to your own husbands, as the Lord. For the man is the head of the woman, just as Christ is the head of the congregation; he is the body of the Savior. But as the assembly is subject to Christ, so are women to men in all things. "- Ephesians 5: 22-24. She should respect her husband and the authority given to him and stand behind him, in the esteem and esteem of the man. Parenthood The fatherhood of God is the source of human parenthood (Ephesians 3:14), on which is founded the honor of the parents, the respect of underage or adult children for their father and mother (→Prov. 1.8) arises from the natural affection that unites them. It is demanded by the commandment of God (Ex 20:12). Parents should view their children as children of God and respect them as human beings. They educate their children to fulfill the law of God by obedience to the will of the Father in Heaven. The parents are the first responsible for the education of their children. First and foremost, they fulfill this responsibility by creating a home where tenderness, forgiveness, mutual respect, loyalty and selfless service are paramount. The education of the virtues begins at home. Here the children have to learn sacrifice, sound judgment and self-restraint, the precondition for a later life as a child of God on his way. Parents have a great responsibility to set a good example for their children. If they can confess their mistakes before them, they will be more able to guide and correct them. Children The respect of children for their parents [love of children] arises from gratitude to those who gave them life and through their love and work enabled them to grow in greatness, wisdom and grace. "Honor your father with all your heart, never forget the pain of your mother! Remember they gave you your life. How can you repay them for what they did for you? "(Sir 7: 27-28). The filial love shows in obedience and true obedience. "Pay attention, my son, to the commandment of your father, do not disregard the teaching of your mother! ... When you go, guide you, when you rest, she will keep you safe, and when she awakens, she will speak to you "(verses 6: 20-22)." A wise son is the fruit of the father's education, the uncircumcised one but do not listen to the admonition." →Proverbs 13: 1. "He who loves his son has the stick ready for him so that he can experience joy later. He who keeps his son in discipline will rejoice in him. "(Sir 30: 1-2)" Ye fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the discipline and commandment of the Lord! " (Ephesians 6: 4). The home is the natural environment in which children are to be led to solidarity and shared responsibility, in a living relationship with God, in the order God has for families. Finally, love should not be forgotten here, love as it is in Kor. 13th, the devoted love, the agape love in 1 Cor. 13: 4-8 SECOND PART How to live in the presence of Jesus The secret of a good family life is to cultivate the connection with Jesus. The divine order alone for the family is not enough. The divine order begins to shape the outward form of family life. In the process, the presence of Jesus must be given room to transform the inner life of the family. How is it when a family lives with Jesus? The Christian faith is a connection with Jesus. Having a relationship with Jesus is like having a relationship with a real person - a personal relationship with words like "seeing - speaking - knowing." He speaks to us through the Bible, we meet him when we help the next one We know Him with all our hearts It is not enough if we just say we see Him with the eyes of faith We hear Him talking through the Bible, we encounter Him with people, we know Him in the depths of our hearts Thus, one can enter into a dynamic personal relationship with Jesus, the Lord does not encounter us like a human person. John 4:24 God is spirit, whoever wants to worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth, the reality of the present Jesus in our families depends mainly on that, so families can have a personal relationship with God who has revealed Himself to us as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, and we must constantly remember that That it is a relationship with a spirit person. "Father of all spirits" Heb. 12:9 God the Most High, Paste into the plane of a human relationship and sent his Son, who became a human, Jesus. Jesus sought us where we are. He became like us. It made sense that we should become like him. 1 John 3 If the Christian faith does not lead to a clear and deepening encounter with the Lord Himself, God's purpose is not achieved. And there is no better place where this encounter can take place than the Christian family. Jesus, the Savior and Lord of the family. The Christian family should recognize God's claim to their household. The starting point for any Christian family life is that every member of the family experiences the forgiveness, love, and welcome that God offers us through Christ. Each individual must accept Jesus as a Savior and get to know him. The Bible leaves no doubt that even young children can have this experience. Jesus spoke of a child, as, Matthew 18: 6 The parallel passage in Mark is "one of these little ones who believe in me" that the child was still so small, what could be taken by Jesus on his arm. Mark 9:36 Faith is a grace of God and not the work of man. The Bible also leaves no doubt that God by no means only gives this grace to adults. Whoever does not accept the kingdom of God like a child will certainly not enter. Luke 18: 15 - 17 Because we come into the kingdom of God through faith, we learn here, through the clear authority of Jesus, that children can even receive infants - his saving grace. Concretely and practically, the parents have to help the child recognize the love of Jesus' daily life. The New Testament faith is not a faith that demands signs, but it is unequivocally a faith that "follows the signs." Mark 16:17 One does not seek experience so that one can believe. But faith certainly leads to affirmative experiences. Without experience, faith becomes cold, dead, formalistic and legal. As the Bible requires, we must also take the second step and help them experience the reality of the living God. Hebrews 11:6 This will immediately have an effect on the way we pray with our children. A true prayer of faith is a prayer that asks for and expects a clear answer. Nothing shows more convincingly the love of God, like a simple answer to a prayer. If a child carries within him but the memory counted encounters with the reality of God, then it needs no fear to have his faith. Faith will bear it. However, if a prayer request has failed, it must be clear that sometimes God says "no". Faith does not make us independent of experience. Rather, faith is confirmed down here, in the kitchen, in the office on the playground. Faith does not lift us out of life. Rather, he brings God into life. Children are able to practice this kind of faith. Surely you can handle disappointments and defeats, through which faith matures and is strengthened. Faith is not built by reason and arguments. Hand in hand with the experience that Jesus is the savior of the family, goes the binding that Jesus is the master of the family. Jesus does not live in the house, but in the throne room. Every discussion, every undertaking, every decision, takes place on this background - this earthly thing not only affects the members of the family, it also affects Jesus - and he is Lord. Nothing harms living faith more than disobedience. On the other hand, there is no easier way to keep Jesus' presence alive than in obedience to His rule. If a family wants to live with Jesus, they must acknowledge their dominion over all walks of life. Two areas of family life serve as a helpful key: time and money. Time means: Every day a best time for the family devotion. If Jesus really lives, if he really is the Lord of our family, then it is unthinkable that not every day a certain time will be kept, which belongs only to him alone. When a family provides Jesus alone for a time, there is a reactionary situation between the family and Him, the Lord of heaven and earth. She opens the door to all the creative power Jesus wants to bring to the family. The second fundamental liability is money. "Money" means: At least one-tenth of the income of the family is given to God. "If a family entrusts a tenth of their income to God, then they make their material destiny dependent on God." The Bible speaks clearly of the tenth as an investment. "Take the tenth part uncut into my storehouse ..... And put me in this way once the trial - so says the Lord of hosts -" if I do not open the windows of heaven and blessing in abundance pour over you. " Melachi 3:10 When God wants the tenth, he invites the family to leave fear and anxiety aside and to give God as the first tenth of the income. Through this, families can experience who have trusted God in this way, how much God blesses our work, how he can save us from unnecessary expenditures, so that we feel no shortage. The liabilities for time and money lay the foundation for Christ's reign in the family. They bind us to Jesus in the point of our highest longing: to have fellowship with God. Likewise in our elementary needs, our daily bread. The priesthood of the parents "You are a royal priesthood ...." 1 Peter 2:9. We are called to the priesthood of all believers, but not only so that we may have our "private guidance" to God. The real meaning is "to proclaim the fame of the one who called us out of the darkness into his wonderful light. 1 Peter 2: 9 In other words, to convey the grace of God to others. The priesthood of all believers also means that a believer has a personal access to God. More importantly, it means above all that a believer can act as a priest to others entrusted to him. The parents are priests of God! They are called by God and appointed to be priests for the children. The basic functions of the priest: To represent the people and to represent the people. The priesthood of the parents includes these two attitudes. First, parents are called to teach their children God. They do this through their example, through instruction and by introducing the children into devotional forms of family worship. In addition, the parents are also called to bring their children to God. They do this mainly through the ministry of prayer. Dtn.6: 4-9 provides helpful guidance for priestly parents when they turn to their children. These are 3 basic steps in teaching the children to God. You bring God to the children - by example "Listen, Israel: The Lord is our God, the Lord alone! So love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength! " This famous scripture is really the beginning of a teaching of the parents. Note that she begins by describing the attitude that the parents themselves must face toward God. The Lord knew that without a fundamental love for God on the part of the parents, all their instruction of the children would be worthless. The starting point and foundation for the priesthood of the parents is their own love and devotion to God. If parents do not have a living fellowship with Jesus, they cannot hope that such a fellowship can convey their children. We cannot convince our children of the importance of God if we never give them any of our time. A prayer less way of life therefore teaches another message. "God is my guest, but I'm in hurry. God is a good man, but now there is something else in it. "It is fortunate for a child to see his parents, knees and pray from time to time when he observes that father and mother get up early or retire on a regular basis to keep quiet time with God. As a result, the child has learned something that cannot replace a lesson. It experiences that God is important. He is important enough that he can claim our time. And it is a personal god. One does not obey only his commandments. You really get in touch with him. Every great man of God has always been a great worshiper at the same time. Just think of Moses, Elijah, Nehemiah, Daniel or the apostles. A great man of God is necessarily a great worshiper, both belong inseparably together. What did the apostles want to learn from Jesus, drive out the devil, heal the sick, perform miracles, turn water into wine, no, they wanted to learn to pray, "Lord, teach us how to pray!" They realized that the power was Jesus sprang from his prayer life. He spent whole nights in prayer. Then he came back in the power of the Spirit. They saw the connection between mission and prayer life and what happened to the ministry of Jesus. This is the key to God's work in our families that parents learn to pray. Prayer is the workshop in which the life of priestly parents is forged into a tool that God can use to bless the children he has given to the parents. From such a prayer life, in the truest sense of the word, a godly life will spring in: life is shaped by God's direct action. You will be able to tell about God naturally. The presence of Jesus in the family will become a reality for the children because it is theirs. Happy the child that has such God-fearing parents. You bring your children to God - through the Word "So let these words of mine enter your heart .... Teach them also your children by talking about them, when you are sitting at home or on a hike. When you lie down or when you stand up "Deuteronomy 11: 18-19 The spiritual formation of our children, which God demands from us here, is no small matter. It's a careful lesson, that is, an all-pervading lesson. God's word becomes a natural reference point for everything that may appear in the family. And through the Word, Jesus begins to live in the family. This happens as naturally as the sunbeams fall into the room when the curtain is pulled aside. Jesus is the goal of our instruction. The presence of Jesus in a family is most clearly in focus as the family gathers in prayer in his presence. Prayer is communion with God. The way we design this time depends on the age of the children. By singing, calling the Lord, reading the Bible, memorizing bible verses, stories and also humor. "I mount thy saying in my heart, that I may not sin against you." Ps. 119: 115 You bring God to the children - through symbols "Bind them to your hand and forehead as a commemorative sign ... and write them on the doorposts of your homes and on your gates” Gen. 11: 18 & 20 The deep truths of God often go beyond the limits of human language. A symbol can express truth more simply and more deeply than mere words. The Christian symbols are spiritual windows through which God's truth can shine. If Jesus is the center of our family life, why should not that be expressed through the decoration of our home? Through pictures, tapestries, posters, panels, we can surround our daily lives with a silent heavenly language - a silent reminder of the presence of Jesus in our midst. The prayer The prayers we teach our children are part of the Christian family life. They bring the child in personal contact with God. But they cannot replace the Father's priestly prayer. His prayers are endowed with a special authority to serve the care and protection of the family. No one can relieve the father of this office because he is the head of the house. The children are brought to God through prayer. The prayer for guidance. Sometimes we do not know what God's will is, and so we must pray that God shows us what His will is. We want to know God's plan in some matter - we first pray for guidance before we can speak a prayer of faith. "Show me, O Lord, your ways, your paths teach me, guide me in your truth, teach me- for you are the God of my salvation: I will always wait for you ... The Lord, who fears him, moves into trust and he lets her know his covenant." Ps. 25:4 ff As a last step, thank him, even before you have received an answer. The worship This is a prayer that we open to God. Praise and worship is at the beginning of every service because it focuses on God. It uses songs, psalms and songs. You can also compose little songs yourself, with simple words of praise and worship. The meditation prayer That is the silent prayer. The prayer in which they simply dwell in the presence of God. Hurried prayer They send a quick prayer to God because they are in the middle of their daily work or in a difficult situation. Prayers are only successful if they are firmly anchored in the prayer life. A person who regularly cultivates prayer and praise can also turn to prayer in an immediate emergency. The promises of God are as great as his boundless love: "all that you pray for and ask ..." Mark 11: 4 Prayer obstacles A great obstacle to prayer is anger and an unforgiving spirit. Mark 11:24: Therefore I say to you, All that you pray for and ask, believe only, you have received, and it will be yours. However, in verse 25, he continues, "..and if you stand and pray, then forgive, if you have something against somebody, so that your Father also forgives your transgressions to heaven." Even sin and guilt can block the prayer. Ps 66: 18, "If I had been wrongly respected in my heart, the Lord would not hear them." "Doubts can also block prayer." The whole basis for prayer is faith and trust in God's Word when praying for something that does not conform to the will of God, praying according to the will of God is a prerequisite for answering the prayer: 1. John 5:14 The last obstacle to prayer would be the resistance of Satan. Satan opposes everything God does and is not powerless. Daniel spoke a prayer that was not answered immediately. But an angel of the Lord then came with the answer, and the angel said, "Fear not, Daniel, for the very first day your heart longed to understand and humble yourself before God, your words have been heard and even A wonderful commentary on our prayer-hearing God Then the angel Daniel told why the answer came only now, because the prince of the Persian Empire stood for 21 days and then the angel Michael helped Daniel. Daniel 10:13 For it is the faith and the prayer that inspires God to act. Therefore Jesus gives us two parables in which he urges us to be persistent in prayer, because prayers are often not answered immediately. Luke 11: 5-13 & 18: 1-8 prayer helps When you start praying and take it seriously, you will start living out of your own human talents and from your own resources. First, they have a daily quiet time with God. This is just the order and the training of the spiritual life. What we sacrifice time for is what really matters to us. When we figure out how much time we really give to God, we can work out how important God is for us. Through Jesus we have access to God. He is the only way to God. Therefore, we can come to God and say, "Here I am, God, I am your child, your problem child, but I still know that what Jesus did is also true for me, and that is why I am getting" a personal audience the king of the universe - that is the prayer. And God wants us to use this opportunity, for ourselves and for our family. The children are brought to God by blessing In addition to the hidden work of prayer, parents also bring their children to God through blessing prayer. This serves the child in a direct way. When parents learn to see this priestly role as God sees them, no area of their children's lives will remain untouched by their blessings. Father! Nuts! God has called you to be priests for your children. Because of this Priesthood Jesus will enter the life and experience of your homes. And here on earth, you and your children will experience a taste of heaven. "But there is eternal life in them, that they know you, the only true God, and whom you have sent, Jesus Christ." John 17: 3 CHAPTER 8 Our family - a testimony to Jesus A "witness" is someone who has observed something. For example, As two cars collided on a crossroads. If a family experiences something with Jesus in their home, they will witness it. This experience makes her a witness. A preacher or teacher may speak of second-hand theory or second-hand knowledge, saying right and helpful things. But a witness, literally, says first hand experience. Jesus is looking for families today who are willing to witness him. Christian fathers, mothers, sons and daughters who quietly begin to live out a family life as God has instructed us to do. And through these examples, Jesus will find access to many houses and hearts. A testimony to Jesus with words has a specific place and purpose in God's plan. But we live in a time when people do not trust mere words. It is impossible for them to respond to the amount of words that are poured out on them daily by modern technology. Think of radio, television, internet, movies and press. But if someone sees how something happens, he stops and watches it. When someone observes a change in someone else's life-a change for the better, of course-it interests him: what has the change done? To become a witness as a family, dedication (surrender) is given to God. Peter expresses it as he wrote to Christians of his day: "Submit to God's mighty hand" 1. Peter 5,6 Let Him come in and take responsibility for our families. Let us deliver our private wishes, hopes and plans and opinions. What does it mean for Jesus to "take responsibility"? The Apostle Peter gives us to understand that God will take care of three basic problems of our lives as we humble ourselves under the almighty hand of God. He cares about our personal esteem, our desire to be a person. He cares about our worries and the practical problems that burden our everyday lives. He cares about our struggle, and the spiritual fight against the forces of destruction and evil. If you look at these three areas as a whole, you will see the breadth of his concern for those who submit to his rule. He pays attention to the hidden yearnings of the heart; the inevitable pressure of circumstances; He also does not lose sight of the final destination for those he calls his property. Now let's look at the three basic problems and how God cares. He cares about our value consciousness. Every person needs the consciousness of personal identity and personal value. If God takes responsibility for our family, we must humble ourselves as a first step in his actions. He begins by showing us some of our duties. He says, "Humble yourself under my hand, I have a plan for you, I have taken over the cause, I am responsible for the kind of personality that each one of you should become, for the kind of family, for work, you do, for all the different circles in which you move. " When God cares about the value of people and families, this act of love also includes the promise, "in his day he will exalt you" (1 Peter 5: 6) Only what Jesus holds of us should be important in our family if we are a Jesus family. What does Jesus think of us? Only that counts . Let's try to please him! Let us leave it to him to take care of our rank and our reputation with other people. "All that you have to do, do so with a willing heart, as if it were for the Lord and not for man" Colossians 3:23 What is our good reputation, our reputation with other people? How indifferent it is how we look in the eyes of the church, in the eyes of the father's employer, in the eyes of the church, in the eyes of the children at school, in the eyes of the government, in the eyes of mother's friends, in the eyes of businessmen, in the eyes of society, in the eyes of relatives? The families who leave this whole question to Jesus and obey him will be a witness to Jesus in each of these relationships. They are no longer dominated by fear: "What will they think of me, what will you do to me?". They need not worry about their position because they have reached a position with him beyond which any human consent or rejection to meaninglessness fades. He cares about our worries "All your worries throw on him, because he cares for you" (1 Peter 5: 7) A person or a family burdened with worry can scarcely be a testimony to Jesus. He makes us his effective witnesses, precisely because he frees us from the cares by taking all our worries and fears on himself. Families who are worried about Jesus do not have to worry about how to give a special "testimony". God makes them his witnesses by letting them experience his fatherly care. He takes care of our faith fight 1 Peter 5, 8-10 Our family life today is full of conflicts. We do not know who our enemy is. We do not know what is waiting for us. We do not know where our way leads. In this confused situation, Jesus comes and leads our faith fight. First, he shows us who our enemy really is. "Your adversary, the devil, is sneaking around like a roaring lion, looking for who he can devour." In the spirit world, there is not only God and good. There is also Satan and evil. You can not only count on the existence of God, you also have to reckon with the existence of Satan. When God leads our faith struggle, he opens our eyes to see who the real enemy is. Secondly, we learn what is expected of us if we entrust our faith fight to Jesus. "Gives resistance in faith. You know that the same sufferings will be imposed on your brothers throughout the world. "This is the great theme of Christians struggling: ENDURE, ENDURE, ENDURE Do not stop until the end of the race. "I fought the good fight, I completed the run" Paul could say that when he was ready for martyrdom. 2 Tim. 4: 6 This means that a Christian family must learn to say a basic "yes" to their situation. Every morning when we wake up we have to say: Yes Lord ..... The world does not know its enemy, does not know what is expected of it and does not know where the road leads. But the Christian knows who the real enemy is. He knows what is expected of them. And he knows the outcome of "Victory" The Christian family relies on a God who is a God of Struggle, a God who achieves victories. If God cares about our struggle, then we can rely on His promises. In his time he will strengthen and strengthen her in his victory. Such a family he leads will be a testimony to him. They are children of a king. They learn his paternal care. They live under the shadow of his powerful right hand. Anyone who meets them will find that they live under the guidance and blessing of their power beyond themselves. The Christian family bases their lives and their hope in believing in a Lord, who testify their lives and their words, a Lord whom they eagerly await. This gentleman has already made a home in the circle of her family. There he already wants to express an image of his royal rule, a foretaste of that day when "He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will dwell with them." Rev. 21: 3. FINAL THOUGHT More and more people are wondering if they should even marry in front of the registry office or in front of the altar because of the considerable difficulties that life in marriage and family brings with them and because of the many failing marriages. Many doubt that they are capable of life-long loyalty at all. However, the author explains in this book: The cohabitation of man and woman is a special gift of our creator, his plan from the beginning. In the eyes of many people, marriage has lost its significance. Often, it is only seen as a possible form of coexistence. But that does not change the fact that the marriage has been instituted by God Himself. If the couple lives under the authority of Jesus and in relationship with the God, a love will arise, resulting in a lifelong commitment. From the marriage, according to God's will, the family grows. The family, like marriage, is under the protection and commandment of God. God alone determines what a family is, and he has built the family community on two strong pillars, authority and love. God's order for the family is that the man is the head of the family and is responsible, just as Jesus is the head of the church. His wife is helping him and the children should obediently grow up to their parents, born of love. The family is founded in God and built on the foundation in the Lord Jesus. He calls this the outer order. God has planned his fellowship with us on earth as a family. There is an incredible abundance of blessings associated with it, but only very few people of our time understand this and therefore do not even begin to enjoy it. The inner order is life as a family in the belief in God. Jesus as the center of the family who takes up residence in our family and whose testimony we are allowed to be. The parents as priestly parents for the children. It must be their concern, and their prayer, their word, and their example, that the children become true people and children of God. Educate children in the will of God, in reverence and obedience to their parents, as God requires. Obedience is the fidelity to the commands issued by the parents. The very natural consideration that the children owe innumerable benefits to their parents must lead them to obedience. But the obedient is moreover a virtue and a commandment; disobedience is a discourtesy and an ingratitude to the parents. Those who oppose them, resist God and have to expect from him the punishment, which often already in this life affects. The dream is to become a family after the heart of God. The love and faithfulness, security and help received from each other then becomes an image and a parable for the love of God, which is still greater than anything experienced now. This overabundance of God's love is proclaimed by Paul: „What no eye has seen, and no ear has heard, which has come to no man's mind: the great that God has prepared for those who love him." Isa. 64: 3 To praise him for his love, our happiness will deepen; because "he does everything in all.